B-movie Buffet: Shogun Assassin


“A noodle drops out of your disbelieving mouth as another soldier of the evil deranged shogun drops dead in an ever more fantastical manner. This is B-movie Buffet”

Spawned from an earlier outing to see “Hobo With a Shotgun” and enlivened by an intense bowl of noodles, I thought it was time to create my own dishes to go with a few hit flicks that stoked the bubbling cauldron of movies condemned to the mainstream masses shit-list. Dishes paired with the energy of the film- a taste of the action, a slurp of the sensational and a bite of the best B movies out there(or at least in my archive). Now there is great debate as to what makes a film a B movie. In my eyes it has to be a cult classic, something that was never a huge cinema hit, or in general was not highly regarded by the contemporary cinema going audience. Mainly a mixed bag of thrillers, sci-fi and horror, they are prized by a select awesome few. As the articles roll out you’ll get the idea.

Shogun Assassin: The movie features deadly daikons, a supreme ninja in a fishnet bodice, the most deadly baby-cart you’ll ever see. Many limbs are sliced off, blood spray reaches out in record breaking distances. Death claws  and spiked knuckles, bleeding sand(just watch the movie). Head splitting and screen splattering. Plus there is some serious Moog synth action, and plenty of quotable dialogue to sputter out of your noodle stuffed face.  The lead, a once great samurai, now on a path reeking of death, seeks retribution for his murdered wife. He is not alone in this quest and roams the lands with his baby kid in tow; the cute side of this bloody debacle.This movie is actually an edit of two other films from a series called Lone Wolf and Cub. Made for the American and European market it is a digestible intro into the mad cap world of the Lone Wolf films. If you like what you see then find the original features and really trip-out on a wild and wonderful epic journey.

The food featured for this showing:  Electrifying ginger and spring onion sauced noodles(Momofuku), cubes of fried pork belly(from the other night), (the endless supply)bread and butter pickles and seasoned bamboo shoots(Momofuku).  A nice earthy base of udon buckwheat noodles, kept things as muted as the colour-ways in the flick. The zing of ginger sparked up the action and the spring onions gave everything a sharp edge(a katana’s perhaps?). Intense fried pork belly provided superior creamy bloodlust and the bamboo shoots gave a soulful reflective crunch.

Get slurping! “G.N.”
Next week’s movie is – Southern Comfort.

read more bmovie adventures: Red Dawn, The Last Starfighter, The Incredible Melting ManSouthern Comfort

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5 Comments on “B-movie Buffet: Shogun Assassin”

  1. April 17, 2012 at 11:44 pm #

    So happy you chose this flick…I still have my collection of the original lone wolf and cub movies on VHS (even though I have no VCR…) Fond memories.
    What about beverage choice? Warm sake for the harcore warrior? Or maybe a cool japanese lager to slake the bloodthirst?

  2. April 18, 2012 at 11:42 am #

    ^ see above! ^

    • April 18, 2012 at 12:40 pm #

      Yep missed half the comment- I recommend, cold sake – warms the mind and numbs the body. A perfect balance for a warrior.

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  1. Black Pudding Intermission | Eat My Words - April 27, 2012

    […] this a culinary interlude. I will save the next edition of B Movie Buffet for the coming week. A short, tasty fried dough snack is the perfect break food, and here we have a […]

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